Family: Cullen Style
by TheRobpattzlover
Summary: Famous actor Edward Cullen doesn't live a typical life:he's in love with bubbly  and naive  teen Bella;his ex-wife,Alice,lives with them;his daughter Angela hates Bella; and his baby, Riley, is intent on making Bella his new mommy instead of Alice.LEMONS
1. Chapter 1

_**EPOV **_

Bella's laughing erratically as she pumps me in her small hand. For some reason I don't even begin to comprehend, the action of groping my junk sends her into a fit of girlish giggles.

"Babe, shhh. You're gonna wake the kids. And not to mention Alice." I warn her softly whilst moaning.

The Alice remark convinces her to tone it down a couple of notches. Yeah, Alice, my ex-wife, doesn't appreciate hearing mine and Bella's sexual trysts; a fact she reminds us of often.

However, I can't help that we get carried away! Bella is nineteen; a sexual tigress. She has those teenage hormones bubbling inside of her hot little body- what kind of boyfriend would I be if I didn't satisfy them?

I'm quickly reminded of Bella's presence when she scoots down out of sight. I feel her envelope her wet mouth around my throbbing dick- bliss. I'm such a lucky bastard. It's an actual legitimate rule in my relationship with Bella that we partake in a sexual rendezvous every single morning. Usually it consists of intercourse, but Bella knows today is a stressful one for me. For today I start production on my new film.

I've done numerous movies in my 32 years (fifteen of those I've dedicated to being an actor), but this one is going to be particularly draining for me. My co-star is acclaimed actress Tanya Denali, who has a diva like reputation. So not looking forward to that, especially since I know it to be true. The first time I was introduced to Tanya I had brought Bella along. She completely ignored my young love and spent the night trying to get into my pants. Not cool. Bella's everything to me; no one is allowed to snub her.

Worse is that I have an entire heap of sex scenes that I am contractually obliged to film with the uptight princess. I suppose they're necessary, others would label be a fortunate man for getting so close to Tanya's tits.

Back to Bella though, who's currently caressing my aching balls. My hands dip under the comforter and I grab her silky brunette hair, pulling her closer to my dick. When she starts carefully licking more forcefully, I'm a goner. My love juice escapes into her mouth.

With a goofy grin plastered on her beautiful face, Bella moves back up on my body, tackling my lips. I can taste myself on her, yuck. I seriously admire this girl's tolerance. No way would I be able to swallow jizz. Although I do have no problem lapping up Bella's aroma. Yum, perhaps later.

Bella's sweet kisses transform into more passionate assaults, it physically pains me to break away, but I must.

"I've got to get ready, babe." I trace a "B" on her bare back with my finger nail.

The pout she gives in response is almost enough ignition to cause me to cum all over again.

"I know." She says; lips curled in a frown.

Bella and I take a quick shower together and are miraculously able to keep the touching to a minimum. However, when we enter our bedroom in towels I can't control myself from tacking her with kisses. I love her. There may be a lengthy age difference between us, but it doesn't matter. She's sweet and intelligent….and she's _mine. _

When Alice and I got a divorce, I was certain I'd never love anyone again. Then no less than a month after Alice filed, Bella strolled through the coffee shop I was sulking in. I remember is so visibly, it occurred a year ago. Bella was a freshmen attending college at California State. She had taken a seat in the far corner, tears brimming in her eyelids.

*_Flashback*_

"_May I sit with you?" I asked, nervous. Being a celebrity of my status, it can be dangerous to approach strangers, but she looks so distraught. _

_My heart fluttered as her warm, brown eyes connected with my green ones. The girl hasn't uttered a word and already I am a goner._

"_Are you joking with me?" Her voice shakes slightly. _

_I shake my head. She laughs in my face._

"_Edward Cullen, big shot movie star, wants to sit by a random young girl in a coffee shop. Hmm…I suppose those rumors are true then."_

_My fingers ball up in anger. I loathe when people act like they know __**ME **__simply because they read an article or heard a news piece on E! I'm not the playboy the media is so keen on spinning me out to be. The only notches on my bed post are three women- one I married for God's sake! And no affairs thank you very much. I was married for ten years and barely even looked at another woman in that time. _

"_You know, you really shouldn't judge people before you get to know them." I pull the wicker chair opposite from her out, sitting down._

_She shrugs before remarking, "That's a good piece of advice. I'm sorry. I'm kind of not myself today."_

"_Want to talk about it?" I find myself praying desperately that she divulges her current predicament. Even if it's the tiniest bit of information, I just want to hear her angelic voice._

"_What's your deal?" She asks, placing her chin in her hands whilst resting her elbows on the table, "Aren't you worried the paparazzi will catch you with new arm candy?"_

"_I can't live my life in fear."_

_She nods her cute head in understanding. _

"_It's just my first day, you know? I only arrived in California yesterday and already I am expected to start school. People here…they're not friendly. I was late to all of my classes and I have no idea how the hell I'm going to manage purchasing the required books for those said classes. College in California is more expense than they let on." She finishes her monologue with a sigh._

"_Where are you from?"_

"_Forks."_

"_Forks?" I've never heard of a place with that name before. Perhaps it's some hidden town in Alaska. _

"_It's located in Washington, small town, not even labeled on the map. But its home you know?"_

"_Actually I do. I grew up in a small town in Michigan."_

"_Which one?"_

"_Pontiac."_

"_That's on the map. I wouldn't refer to it as relatively unknown." She remarks._

"_True."_

_*End of flashback*_

Bella collects the necessary supplies into her bag, preparing for her day at college. Since moving in together, I have begged Bella to let me pay for her college expenses, but she adamantly refuses. Still, she can't pass up a shopping trip. Women!

When we're decent, we join Alice and the kids for breakfast in the family dining room.

As fucked up as it is, my ex-wife lives with us. Alice despises Bella. She strongly believes Bella is a hazard to the children, being so young and even I'll admit…ditzy at times. Honestly though, I have a theory that Alice is just jealous. She hasn't dated since we split.

Ironically, she divorced me stating we never spent any quality time together. Well now I see her more than ever! Alice lost the home we once shared when the bills became too much. I paid her a large amount in child support, but our prenup had prevented alimony. Hence, while she was receiving a hefty sum for the children, she idiotically spent it lavishly on herself and other wasteful venues.

She had begged me to let her stay and I accepted immediately. I wasn't too thrilled to have to share a house with my ex, but I got to see my kids everyday- an opportunity I couldn't pass up.

The only good product of my union with Alice was our two great kids: Angela, 7, and Riley, 3. They were perfect, but the divorce had been difficult on them. Angela especially since she was old enough to notice the changes occurring in her environment. She hasn't exactly fully warmed up to Bella yet. I know she's still angry, she blames Bella. Angela had this fantasy I would reunite with Alice. When I started going steady with Bella, it became increasingly clear that would not be happening.

"Excited for school, Ange?" I tousle her locks between my fingers.

"Daddy, stop! You're messing it up." She whines.

"Yes, Daddy _stop_. I spent all morning perfecting that hair." Alice scolds. She sways her hips to the sink then proceeds to empty her coffee mug in the drain.

"Sorry, kid." I kiss Ange's hair, completely careful in this action. The last thing I need is for my seven year old daughter to give me a bruise.

Riley pounds his tiny fist on his chair, demanding my attention. I swoop him into my arms, peppering kisses on his chubby cheeks. He giggles- at least someone appreciates me!

"Don't squeeze the boy to death." Alice loves to disapprove of everything I do.

"Sorry, I'm about to place him back in his chair, that okay with you master?" I ask her sarcastically. She's such a bitch when it comes to me and my parenting.

"Hey sweetie?" Bella asks as I set Riley down gingerly.

She looks so sexy today. She's got a simple white tank on with ripped skinny jeans. The differences between Alice and Bella are staggering. Alice dresses in elaborate clothing, everything is designer. For example, today her agenda consists of caring for Riley and eating lunch with her mother; yet, she's dressed in a black mini dress with stilettos.

"Yeah Babe?" I see Alice cringe at how I address my Bella.

"I just wanted to remind you that Jacob's staying with us for the weekend. He's coming up tomorrow since he doesn't have school Friday. I'm picking him up at the airport then he's here for a couple days. "

Jacob is Bella's fourteen year old brother. They have an incredible bond that I hope Angela and Riley one day reciprocate. Jake's a cool kid. He wasn't too thrilled about me when we first met. I think he was worried I'd get in the way of his relationship with Bella. Once it was obvious that would never happen, he let me in.

Angela's ears perk up in interest at this new conversation topic. She harbors a bit of a crush on Jacob. All the little girls seem to. Jake's perfectly aware of that fact too. I'm banned from visiting the mall with him though. Apparently, the girls select me to ogle when I'm there instead of Jacob. What can I say? No way am I apologizing for being handsome and famous.

"Yeah I remember. I miss the guy. How's he doing?"

"Good, I guess." Bella replies sadly. I know how much she misses him.

I embrace her and kiss her lips softly.

"Have a good day at school." I kiss her again, unable to sedate my passion for her. She has late classes on Wednesday so I know she'll be home for awhile longer. I wish I could stay with her. Perhaps we could finish our little make out session up in our bedroom…or the recreational room. On the pool table or in the hot tub….

"Mmm…have a good day on set." She kisses me openly on the mouth.

I have a distinct feeling that will be impossible, but I am grateful for her encouragement regardless.

"Oh and sweetheart", Bella pulls my left ear to her pouty lips so she can whisper quietly; "don't forget you owe me a thorough fuck tonight." She lets out a devilish giggle when my always eager dick tries to spring into her pants.

Sweet baby Jesus, I love this girl.


	2. Chapter 2

**BPOV**

The blue ink pen sways against the lined paper. This is my writing process, I simply flow with it. There's no thinking; just writing. This sometimes can be lethal. One time while I was composing a rough draft to a very prestigious essay, I ended up writing a five page paper about the contours of Edward's dick and all the magic it can create. In my defense, I was distracted by the sounds of Edward pleasuring himself in the shower.

Focus, Bella!

I reposition myself on the bed- lounging Indian-style. Peaceful. My pen continues its dance with the paper and perfection is produced. After my rough draft is complete, I begin to type the final version on my preppy, lime green laptop. Edward says it's foolish of me to not simply do the rough draft on a word document, but I refuse that method. I know what works for me and I'm damn well going to continue with it!

I'm studying to become…I've got no clue what I want to become. It's not that my mind is void of ambitions, I've just never been a plan girl, ya know? I let things happen depending on the situation. I follow where my happiness lies.

Ugh. My belly's rumbling, time for a snake. My hand is on the doorknob when I realize I left my jeans scattered on the floor. Oopsies. Alice would definitely NOT appreciate me mooning her in my undies. Her face would be priceless, I giggle at the image.

Another time perhaps, it's too funny _not_ to experiment.

I pull my jeans up my thighs with a frown plastered on my lips. I much prefer being naked. Being naked is so liberating. Edward and I use to go days without wearing a stitch of clothing. Now with our company that's not an option. So sad. My vagina is literally whimpering- she loathes being confined as much as my tits do.

I shimmy- yes, shimmy, damn it!- my way into the kitchen. I gaze out the wide window, admiring the California sun. It's almost time for it to set which means Edward will be returning to me soon. The thought makes me grin like a goofy fool. He owes me a few orgasms for that selfless blowjob I gifted him with this morning.

Rummaging through the pantry, I discover my favorite meal- frosted strawberry pop tarts. They're food's version of sex. Yummy deliciousness all mixed into a few heavenly bites. I should totally do a commercial advertising them. Hm, that's a brilliant idea. I'll discuss the prospect with Edward; perhaps his people can set me up.

I resume my wicked dance moves into the living room.

"Be your teenage dream TONIGHT." I croon. Hey, I could sing on the commercial too! I can envision a number one hit already.

More lyrics slip through my vocal cords. I'm getting really into the beat that's playing in my active brain.

"Bella!" Alice's irritated voice seizes my movements. She's sprawled out on the luscious sofa, skimming through a fashion magazine. On the rug, Riley's playing with his toy truck contently. I lean down and give him a kiss on his head. The grin he shoots me makes me so giddy. He's such a handsome little baby; a mini Edward. I want one!

"Sorry for the inconvenience." I plop down on a nearby recliner. I'm not really sorry, not all. This is _my_ house. I selected it with Edward. I don't have any issues with Alice living with us; she's just such a freaking grouch. I mean, can't she lighten up?

Enough time wasted on the downer though, so I refocus my attention to the handsome little man staring at me. I position my face into goofy pictures- earning heaps of giggles from Riley.

"Belwa iz silly." His dimples are more definite when he declares this. He sets his noisy truck down and carefully walks over to me. It's an adorable site seeing a toddler walk. They're so tiny and it's amazing to them. They're limited on so many aspects; I imagine it's a thrill to have at least one shared trick with adults.

I gobble down the last of my pop tarts and then envelope Riley into my arms, squeezing him tightly to my chest.

"You're such a good little boy." I swoon into his ear.

"Belwa's baby!" He declares strongly.

"You got it! You're my little man!" I high five his chubby palm; his eyes gleam in approval.

The tension radiating off of Alice is palpable. Whenever I am playing with Riley, she gets very uncomfortable and watches me like a hawk. I recognize that, in her opinion, my bond with Riley oversteps boundaries. Countless times, I have attempted to convey to her that I have no wish to replace her as a mother. I would never even ponder inaugurating myself to that role. I understand rather clearly that Alice is Riley's mother- and I respect it.

But what are you gonna do? Alice is Alice. If she wants to spend her life moping then let it be. Meanwhile, I'll have some fun with my cutie pie of a stepson.

As if on cue, Angela graces us with her entrance. She blandly ignores my presence and strides over to her special pink chair off to the right of the couch. Sighs. My relationship with Angela seems to only take steps back, not forward.

"Did you have a decent day at school?" Alice counters to her daughter. The smirk is clear in her voice; Alice absolutely _loves _Ange's coldness towards me.

"Yeah. There was this boy and…"

I convert my attentions to Riley. Angela is advanced for her seven years and if I try to include myself in this talk, I'll get some sort of lashing. Yep, I'm scared of a seven year old. Don't judge me.

"Belwa!" Riley whispers to me.

"What little dude?" I tickle his tummy. His laughter fills the spacious room and Angela throws me a death glare.

"You're rude." She bluntly informs me.

I wait for Alice to scold her- nothing. I despise situations like this when Ange is being a brat and Edward's not here to defuse the situation. I'm powerless to her abuse.

"Um…sorry?" I want to hit myself- could I get anymore lame?

"You should be. You always have to steal _everything_ from me." And let the dramatic tantrum begin.

She stomps up to her room and I'm left with Alice in an awkward silence.

"You know, you could at least try to be courteous to her."

"And you know, you could at least try to _not _be a BITCH to me."

"How. Dare. You." The venom in Alice's voice makes me gulp.

Despite his protest, I return Riley to his place on the rug.

"I don't mean any disrespect. But I can't sit back and take this abuse anymore. You make me feel unwelcome in my own home." She scoffs at my words.

"Save it! Stop pretending like this is your home; we both know this is _Edward's _home. You're just a visitor in his life. The little whore who is fascinating him for the time being." The look on my face is of complete mortification. She's hitting me where it hurts.

"Listen sweetie," she resumes, "Edward was tied down for ten years. He's an incredible man, a one woman man. Anyways, it all adds up. He is free for the first time in over a decade and here comes a young girl, besotted with all the world has to over. Plus you're adventurous in bed, a young girl waiting to be sexually deflowered."

"You have no knowledge of what you're talking about. You think you know Edward, but you don't. I may have only known him for a year, but that doesn't mean I have any less connection with what's in his heart. The fact that you're so certain he would use someone in such a derogatory manner signals that you have no idea what his intentions are. It's just pathetic that you're trying to blame me for the problems in your own life."

I'm not a fighter; hence, I exited the scene. I wanted to be friends with Alice…at first. I've never had a female best friend, but she's reminding why that is. They're too catty, too confrontational.

The Angela situation does sadden me. I desperately want her to like me. She's Edward's baby girl. I wish she'd give me a chance, but I understand. It's difficult witnessing a parent move on with another person. It took me awhile to warm up to my mother's husband, Phil. I'll be patient with her. Perhaps one day we'll be friends. It will be worth the troubles we're battling now.

~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~o~

"You think we'd get tired, but…sex never fails to satisfy my every need down to the core." I exclaim, breathless.

Edward and I have been going all night and we're both still insatiable.

"Mhm." He agrees contently.

I feel his dick coming back to life at a rapid pace. Giggling, I place my legs on either side of his thighs, skillfully lining my opening with his dick. I sink down immediately, taking him inch by inch as fast as I can. My vagina is still tight (not to mention is VERY well endowed) hence it's awhile before he's fully in. I ravel my hips up and down once he's fully in, waving my tits in his eager face.

His hands reach up to grab the girls, but I catch them and pin them near his head. He _never _lets me be in control so it's a nice change of pace.

The thunder booming outside is camouflaging our moans, effectively hiding them from Alice. I move my hips on top of him like a bitch in heat. There's no rhythm, just a pussy desperately searching for friction.

"Baby, I'm so close, I'm almost there." I'm chanting in his ear, sooo close.

And I'm there.

I push my pussy down on his penis more, intensifying my release.

"DAD! AHH!"

The scream scares me half to death, but I'm so lost in my orgasmic humping I continue humping him frantically. I don't fully realize what is going down until Edward shoots up and wraps a blanket around my naked chest. He pushes me off his lap and then I see her- Angela.

Shit.


	3. Chapter 3

**EPOV**

In my lifetime, I have had many awkward conversations. Heck, some were downright humiliating. When I was fourteen, my mother caught me pouring through the pages of Playboy magazine. Yeah, that's a memory too painful to recollect. Then there was a time that I had to inform an actress I was working with (out of respect her name will be omitted from my monologue) that if she continued to move upon me so seductively during scenes, a boner would embarrassingly arise. Normal, yes, but definitely not appropriate. Especially when the said actress is wed to the director.

However, none of those compare to having to explain to my seven year old angel that she caught me having sex with my girlfriend. Even worse, I have to divulge the fact to Alice, who's sure to be pissed off with a vengeance. Yay me!

The image of Angela's terrified face is burned forever in my mind. I'm seriously considering hiring a therapist for the poor child, there's nothing more traumatizing than walking in on a parent in the throes of passion. I don't blame her if she doesn't want to see me today. Honestly, I'm nervous about facing her.

Which is why I'm sitting in the kitchen all alone, counting down the hours until I have to bring up this horrible event.

"Baby, it's five thirty in the morning. Why are you up?" Bella plops down in the stool next to me. She's got a robe on, securely covering the lingerie she's wearing underneath.

"I can't sleep. I'm being haunted by the sight of Angela…the poor girl…"

"Yeah." Bella reaches for a bagel and starts nibbling on the edges, a nervous habit of hers. "I'm willing to pay for the therapy she's going to need for about oh, the rest of her life."

"Ugh, don't remind me. You know, I can't decide who's more embarrassed: me or her."

"She's never barged into our room before. The thunder must have frightened her." Bella concludes aloud.

"Frankly, I'm more worried about Alice's reaction."I reply honestly.

"Oh God, I don't even want to think about it." Bella's eyes bulge.

"Hey, do you think Angela even knows what we were doing?..."

"I bet she does to a certain extent. Kids are so advanced and perverted these days. But even if she doesn't know the mechanics of sex, it doesn't diffuse the situation. She is perfectly aware she witnessed something that she most definitely shouldn't have."

"Who witnessed something they shouldn't have?" Alice's voice rings from the kitchen entrance.

"Jesus!" I instinctively jump out of my stool and it lands on the tiled floor with a thud.

"Sweetie, are you okay?" Bella rubs my back while I regain a healthy heartbeat.

"Gawd Edward, what's got your panties in such a twist? Scared of the thunder?" Alice taunts.

"No, of course not! You just caught me off guard, that's all." I reply back defensively.

Alice chuckles in mockery of me.

"What are you doing up so early anyways? Don't you need your "beauty" sleep?" I question.

"Shesh, I don't know. I suppose I can't sleep when you two aren't serenading me with the sounds of your moaning."

Bella and I both blush simultaneously.

"Wow Bella, thanks for the eyeful. You are aware that there are kids living in the house, right?" Alice raises her brows whilst evaluating Bella's clothing…or rather lack thereof. The insult causes Bella to quickly tie the robe tighter around her waist.

I hate when Alice treats Bella as if she's some streetwalker instead of the love of my life. Bella's too sweet to say anything affective, but I can easily detect how uncomfortable the situation is for her.

"Alice, shut the fuck up. You're the one who use to parade around in the buff."

"Yes, but that's different. They're MY kids."

"Yeah, I think they'll thank you if you cover up for EXACTLY that reason."

"Umm…I'm going to take a shower." Bella announces quietly to me. I kiss her on the lips, displaying how much I love her. And showing how meaningless Alice's words are.

"Damn it, Ally. Can you stop being such a bitch? Especially for things you once did yourself." I scold.

"Stuff if Edward. The kids barely walked then. Anyways, that was my house."

"And this is Bella's house."

"For now." She mumbles.

"Forever." I reply firmly.

"Wake up, Eddie. She's nineteen and you're this famous actor offering her the world on a silver platter."

"Ugh…I am not discussing this topic with you AGAIN."

Alice rolls her eyes and turns to prepare her morning coffee.

"Ally, there is actually something we need to talk about. It's important." I fiddle with an orange that was in the breakfast basket; mindlessly shredding the skin off.

"Oh my gosh, don't tell me you knocked Bella up." Alice's eyes minimize in genuine fear.

"NO!" I practically shout at her. A baby is definitely NOT in the cards anytime soon. I don't think this family unit needs another member at the moment.

"Thank you, Jesus." Alice praises in relief.

"Erm…it's actually about Angela."

"Okay..? Go on…" Alice is completely oblivious to where this conversation is headed.

"She kind of um…saw…Bella and I…you know…we were…and then she….and then….and we…it was an accident, really…"

"Edward, I don't speak Spanish." She huffs in annoyance.

"Angela saw Bella and I having sex." There I said it.

"SHE WHAT?" Shrouds of glass scatter across the floor as Alice looses the grip on her mug. Meanwhile, my hands fling to protect my ears.

"Shit, Alice. Keep it down." I complain.

"I shall do no such thing, Edward _Cullen." _Her voice lowers slightly; however, the tone is still vicious enough to make my balls curl up in fright.

"Look, she didn't see anything…_too _inappropriate."

"You're kidding, right? Our daughter discovering you engaging in ANY kind of sexual activity is HIGHLY inappropriate. Have you spoken to her yet?"

"No. After she erm…well, you know," Alice gestures with her hand for me to get on with my thought, "I pulled my boxers on and ushered her back to her own bed. But no. There wasn't one word exchanged on her part. I just said "goodnight" and that I loved her."

"Good. The last thing Angela needs is for you to damage her even _more _with idiotic rambling."

"Hey, stop treating me like the bad guy."

"Pfft…you ARE the bad guy. Is it that hard to take the necessary precautions to shield your daughter from such trysts?"

"Fuck Alice, it's not like I planned on my seven year old to discover me screwing my girlfriend. I don't need her to pull farther away from me than she already is proceeding to do."

"Whatever." Alice sighs. "Listen, let ME talk to her. Contrary to what you believe, I do know you. And if my intuition is correct you'll _both_ be even more scarred if you handle it."

"Shouldn't we do this together? Co-parenting and all?"

"This is a task for a mother to handle, believe me. No girl wants to talk to her dad about sex. Can we please spare her? You've already made her uncomfortable enough."

"Fine." I grumble. I cannot debate against Alice's logic.

"Thank you." Alice smiles at her small victory.

Tanya attempts to shove her tongue down my throat for the umpteenth time today, but I manage to keep my lips locked tightly. No way is her slutty tongue introducing herself to my Bella-crazed one. Fuck that!

Alas, I have no option but to push my mouth closer to hers and even suckle her bottom lip a bit. A tiny moan escapes her and I sigh internally. _Oh, what I do for this job…_

"And…CUT!" The director yells.

HALLILUJAH! An entire choir of angels sings in my head.

I take this wonderful opportunity to dart off to my trailer. Mid way to reaching my destination, the director, Chris Weitz, hollers for my presence.

"Hey, Edward, I thought you'd want to see the scene. I can already tell it's epic."

Hmm…do I really want to see myself making out with Tanya? Nope, not at all.

"Uh, yeah sure." I reply.

I view the scene in utter disgust. Everyone has been raving about the chemistry Tanya and I apparently share…yeah, I don't see it. To me, it looks I'm in literally in critical pain kissing her. I suppose it goes with the character, Romeo. He's a suicidal lad, hence a look of misery suits him…I guess anyways.

After I complete that round of torture, I relax in my trailer. I'm giddy like a boy about to lose his virginity when I see Bella has been trying to contact me via text.

_How's filming? ~Bella_

_ Fine. It'd be better if you were my Juliet. ~Edward_

_ Aww, you poor thing. Tanya eye fucking you again? ~Bella_

_ Can you blame her? xD ~Edward_

_ Yum..nope, suppose I can't. Perhaps we can schedule a threesome? ;) ~Bella_

_ Aha, no thank you. I don't even wanna think about the diseases her pussy carries. ~Edward._

_ Lol, so…when are you gonna talk to Ange? ~Bella._

What?

How did the conversation switch from us partaking in a threesome to me discussing the birds in the bees with my baby girl?

_Um, actually Ally is going to. I've been eliminated from that particular event." ~Edward_

_ Oh. It's probably for the best. ~Bella_

_ Yeah. ~Edward _

A light knock on the door disturbs my chat with Bella. I bid her farewell then answer the door.

Tanya.

_Oh, joy._

"Hey. What can I do for you?" I attempt really, REALLY hard to keep my voice void of rudeness. If I cannot be civil to Tanya, the rest of filming will be complete hell.

"Edward, why do you have such an opposition to me?" Her voice cracks and I immediately feel guilty about my unprofessional attitude towards her.

"I'm sorry", I relent with a sigh, "I'm not usually so standoffish. A lot is going on in my home life so I apologize if I haven't been the friendliest guy to hang around."

I offer Tanya a weak smile. It is true that I haven't been as polite to her as I have been with former co-stars. However, she's just so demanding that I pay her attention. It's not normal. I hate to be the guy to assume she harbors a bit of a crush, but at this point it's nearly impossible for me to conclude otherwise.

I wait impatiently for her to accept my apology and skedaddle, but she simply continues to stand there. It's as if she's expecting me to break out in song or beg her forgiveness.

Just as I'm about to return back to my trailer, she pulls my face in a tight grasp and smacks a kiss right on my lips. The act is so sudden I am unable to order my arms to push her away **IMMEDIATELY**.

"Got it!" I hear a voice announce gleefully from nearby.

I push Tanya off me- not giving a fuck if she falls flat on her ass. Out of the corner of my eye I see a paparazzo skipping away, jumping for joy.

_Fan-fucking-tastic!_


	4. Chapter 4

**Thank you so much for the reviews on this story! I'm glad you're enjoying it. :) **

**I would appreciate it if you would read my other stories as well. In recent days, I have published two more so I hope you enjoy them.**

**Anyways, on with the story…**

**EPOV **

"Bella!" I hollered for my girl's presence as soon as I barged through the front entrance.

"Hi, Edward." Jacob greeted me with a smirk on his face.

"Jake...I thought you weren't arriving until tomorrow. Not that I'm not happy to see you!" I quickly added.

"Change of plans." He shrugged.

"Oh." I replied lamely. It wasn't that I was displeased to see Jake; I had only hoped all of these messy predicaments I was currently tangled up in would be resolved by the time he came to stay.

"And Bella's at the market. Something about spoilt milk."

"Oh erm...okay. Did she give any indication as to how long this little trip would keep her?"

"Nope." Jake responded, relaxed. He skipped- freaking skipped- to watch television in the living room. I knew he enjoyed the T.V. that took up more than half of the wall. Secretly, I thought that was why he pestered Bella to let him visit so often.

"Well, well, if isn't Mr. Movie Star Who Likes to Kiss His Co-Stars Inappropriately." Bella's voice resounded from behind me suddenly.

"Shit, you heard?" Bella nodded. "Fuck, rumors fly like wild flower in this town."

"Mhm. My miniature grocery trip was delayed from all the phony apologizes I was receiving."

"Babe, I am so sorry. You have to know it's not true. I mean yes, we kissed. But she forced herself on me!" I stepped closer to her, testing the waters. I really had no desire to get sucker punched.

However, Bella's reaction was not on my hefty list of expectations. Instead, she burst out laughing. Yep, heaps of giggles so powerful she had to clutch her seldom sides for support.

"Sweetie, of course I know that!" She granted a quick kiss to my confused face. "I've been with you long enough to know things are never as they seem. I'm not an idiot; I know how manipulative the media is."

"So you're not angry? At all?" I inquired, completely stunned at the lack of monotone in her reaction.

"Why should I be? I trust you." This girl is incredible.

"You're not even a LITTLE bit jealous?" I grabbed her ass and rejoiced when she let out a little squeal.

"Hm...Depends..." She trailed off, biting down on her bottom lip, a move with enough merit to give me a semi.

"On?"

"How sexy was it? Was there any heavy moaning involved? I'll be so sad if I missed the opportunity to see two fuck-hot people go at it. As your girl, it's my right to witness if you're going to swap spit with others." Bella nibbled on my ear and I fucking _grunted._

"It wasn't voluntary on my behalf. She attacked me."

"Yum…so she's animalistic. I told you she'd be a good bed mate to include in our fun time."

I pulled back to study Bella's face. The glint in her eyes told me she was only joking….kind of. I had no doubt that she would be up for a threesome. Perhaps we can dabble into that someday, but not right now. I am WAY too selfish to share my Bella with anyone. Though the image of another hot female fondling Bella's breast is….

"Dada!" Riley yelled as he scampered over to me.

I instantly converted to daddy mode and ran to meet my toddler.

"Hey, Buddy!" I bounced him in my arms. "How's it going?"

"Belwa and Jakey are playin trucks with me." He announced gleefully.

"That sounds like fun!" I inserted enthusiastically. "Did you miss me?"

"Lots!" He nodded furiously.

"Missed you too." I kissed his chubby cheeks.

"Angela home?" I asked Bella.

"No. Alice picked her up from school then took her to have that TALK. I think they're getting ice cream."

"Aha, that means Alice is purchasing Angela a fat free yogurt."

"Probably." Bella giggled.

"I sincerely hope her little chat with Angela goes well."

"Any idea what she's going to say?"

"No, that's why I'm so concerned. Alice doesn't always tell the truth exactly and there are certain points I would rather she didn't exaggerate on."

No less than an hour later, I found myself lounging on the sofa with Jake, watching some lame show on MTV. "Jersey Shore", I think that's what Jake called it. Whatever its title, it was VERY possibly the worst program I've ever had to endure. The thought of it sends shudders through my body.

As another dreadful episode resumed, I watched Bella play with Riley. It was a beautiful sight to see how wonderful those two interacted. Joy fluttered in my body as they shared laughs and tickles. I was incredibly lucky to have a girlfriend like Bella. She accepted my children with all of her heart and though we were not legally a couple, she tackled on the occupation of stepmom better than anyone.

It was a safe bet to guess that Riley harbored more affection for Bella than he did his own biological parents! As for Angela, I think she secretly likes Bella. If Alice wasn't so manipulative, Ange and Bella could have a cute little friendship going on.

I couldn't help the surge of male pride that rippled through me at seeing my girl playing with my son. She'd make a terrific mom someday. I only hoped that day would come in the next couple of years. I wanted a family with Bella more than anything I've ever wanted before in my life. Hopefully, she reciprocates those feelings. It's not that I want A bigger family; it's that I want a bigger family with HER.

"We're hooommmmeee!" Alice sang; alerting everyone to her entrance.

"Hey Jake!" Angela had hearts in her eyes as soon as she saw him.

"Hey Ange, how's it going?" He gave her a warm smile.

Bastard! How dare he work his "moves" on my seven year old? I tell you, he's a player in the making!

I attempted to resign my anger- he's just a kid himself after all.

"Not much, you?" Ange fluttered her tiny eyelashes in a sad gesture of flirting.

Jake simply shrugged and returned his attention to the television.

"Don't I get a hello?" I asked. Angela actually blushed as she met my eyes.

"Hi daddy." She leaned over to give me a VERY awkward hug.

"I'm gonna go to my room now…" She darted- literally- out of my sight.

Curious to the scene that had just occurred; I stammered off to the kitchen after shooting Bella a quizzical look. What exactly went down in this little talk Alice gave?

Alice was on the kitchen stool, filing her nails. Oh the vanity she possesses! She didn't even say hello to Riley…

"Goodie, Eddie, you're just the person I needed to speak to."

"Right, but first we need to discuss what you told Angela. She blushed when I spoke to her. _Blushed. _Angela Cullen does NOT blush." I exclaimed, exasperated.

"Well, Eddie, I told her what she wanted to know. She asked point blank what Bella was doing moving on top of "Daddy"."

"Oh God, Ally! What did you tell her?" I started sweating.

"Ugh, must I spell it out for you? I told her you were having sex. And when she asked me what that meant, I divulged the basic intercourse information."

"WHAT?" The entire house shook. "You told a SEVEN YEAR OLD girl, how to have sex?"

"Ugh, don't word it like that. It makes it sound as if I was encouraging her to do it herself. I'm not going to lie to her Edward. She witnessed a grown-up activity; hence, she received a grown-up answer. There's no shame. Sex is a natural part of relationships.

Besides, it's not like I pointed to picture or gave details about erotic positions. There was none of that. And believe me, I think this just saved us from the fiasco of having a pregnant teen. We've scarred her for life." Alice actually looked _thrilled _about this new development.

"Ally, you are insane. Plain and simple." My hands stroked my unruly hair.

"You'll thank me for this later Mr. Cullen! By the way, if Angela asks you if Bella's pregnant, don't be alarmed. I'm not sure she understands the whole protection aspect. That piece of the explanation seemed a bit fuzzy even to me."

"Wow. Things just keep getting better. You give our baby the sex talk, but lack on the protection details. Hooray!" I sighed.

"Oh stop being so dramatic." Alice shrugged me off.

"Edward?" Alice queried.

I tensed up, detecting the change in her voice. She was serious now. Not mean serious, but serious- serious.

"Yes?" The concern was clear on my voice. A million terrible possibilities as to where this conversation could be heading hit me in a flash.

"I've been thinking really serious lately about our situation." She began.

Oh my god, YES! She's going to move out. Cue the happy dance! Oh yeah! Oh yeah!

"I love our family so much; we've made beautiful children, Edward."

"Indeed we have." I agreed.

"They're such intelligent kids and so well behaved...most of the time anyways. Anyways, I've been thinking and…"

"Yes?" I could barely contain the excitement in my voice. An Alice free household is a happy household!

"I think we should have another baby." She stated bluntly with a fucking smile spread across her face.

My mouth dropped open with so much force it felt like it would remain in that position permanently.

What. The. FUCK?

**So a bit of a bombshell to end the story with. **

**A bombshell that is going to dramatically affect how things turn out for our beloved characters. **

**I was wondering, who's POV do you prefer: Bella or Edward's? Or do you like them both?**

**Please review and let me know what you think!**

**The more reviews I get, the more inspired I am to write fast…it's true. :) :) **


	5. Chapter 5

**Thank you for the reviews on the last chapter! :D**

**I'm back at school, but I have a goal to upload at least once a week. However, the chaps may be a bit shorter. **

**Also, I would like to remind everyone that this story is SUPPOSE to be a bit silly. Of course dramatic things will occur, but my characters aren't fussy and dramatic. Hence, their reactions are going to be a bit loopy. **

**Anyways…enjoy!**

EPOV

A baby? A fucking baby? As in I stick mine in hers and we produce a baby?

Like a legitimate, living, breathing, walking, growing, blubbering, slobbering, REAL kid?

"Eddie, are you still with me?" Alice waves her petite hand over my shell shocked face.

"Am I alright? Am I alright?" I ask deliriously, chuckling. "Of course I AM alright. The question is: Are YOU alright? Because I would almost bet my millions that you've gone loony tune crazy."

"You're such a child, Edward!"

"And you're a…." Alice shoots me a death glare and I gulp.

"That's what I thought." She warns, down casting her eyes on my trembling bones. "Anywho, moving on to the situation at hand, will you give me your sperm or not?"

"Fuck, Ally. You sure know how to downplay a situation!" I claw at my head, plucking a couple strands of red hair in the process.

"And you know how to exaggerate the simplest of requests!"

"Simple? You're asking me to create another human life with you! How does the validity of that not connect with your fashion-crazed brain?" I demand.

"Oh, spare me, Eddie." I swear to God himself that if she dares refer to me as "Eddie" again I'll tear her womb right out of her- that will eliminate the baby predicament too. Talk about killing two birds with three stones….or however that saying goes.

"I have discussed with a doctor, Dr. Hale to be exact, and I'm willing to explore a different route than traditional baby-making."

"Perhaps you should just adopt?" I advise. Hell, I'm almost willing to do the entire process for her if it will end the insanity!

"Ugh…adopting is just so…impersonal." Ally shudders.

"Hey! I'm adopted!" Jake hollers, entering the kitchen without warning.

Hence I scream. A chick-like yelp.

"Dude, seriously?" Jake's eyes dilate to the size of saucers.

"Erm…Sorry?" I offer awkwardly. The kid has ninja skills I tell you! There was no quack in the floorboards to announce his lurking.

"No I am sorry. Do you have any idea how many YouTube hits I would have gotten if I had recorded that little outburst of yours?" Jake chuckles. "At least next time I know to bring my camera."

My face turns ten shades of red. I would DEFINITELY never live that down in the public.

Oblivious- or uncaring- to my worried expression, Jake grabs a bottle of Sunny D and skips- once AGAIN- to the living room.

Great, now I have ANOTHER thing on my list of worries.

"Okay, as I was getting at, I would like to give our kids another biological child." Alice says with a huff, annoyed she was interrupted.

"Between Bella and me, and you and whoever you end up with, they will have plenty of siblings." I reason.

"That's not what I mean, Edward…." Alice glances down.

"Look Ally, we've had our go. There's no compromise on this one. You and I are done with procreating. Enough said." I kiss her forehead before exiting the room. I was burning to know the reason behind her pleads, but I know Alice- the only way to conclude a topic is to refuse to acknowledge it.

"Edward stop it…I'm trying to watch the show!" Bella whines as I nip on her earlobe.

"Fuck it. You know I'm way more entertaining than this show. If you can even call it that…" I mumble.

BAD idea!

Bella introduces me to her right hook, feeling the need to reprimand me for lacking interest in the shit feast that is Gossip Girl.

"How dare YOU." She scolds.

"C'mon Bella, this show is for teenagers."

"I AM a teenager dipshit." Screw her and her logic!

I groan and roll off of her delicate- but dangerously sexy- little body.

"Babe, can't you just Tivo it? I don't pay an extra thirty bucks for that thing for it not to be used."

"Ugh, how many times must we go through this? It's NOT the same watching it when it's a recording."

"You have no problem with watching the DVDs-repeatedly." I groan.

"Yeah, but that's different." She shrugs her shoulders as if that justifies everything.

"But the same exact thing happens every single episode. Chuck and Blair break up because he acts like an ass. Then, they realize they can't live without one another and reunite. Meanwhile, Serena and Dan flirt with each other shamelessly, but never hook up because another love interest stumbles on by. Rufus is oblivious to half of his surroundings, and Lily deceives everyone "lovingly". As for Nate…well he's just there." I recap.

"OH babe, you know all their names! Yay!" She squeals and gives me a slobberish kiss on the mouth.

I seize the opportunity to charm the pants right off of her- literally.

"Mhm, indeed. So…what points do I earn for that?" I deliberately place my hand directly over her pussy.

"Hmmm…I'm sure we can think of some way to repay you for your utter brilliance." She taunts.

Five minutes later, and I'm balls deep inside of her- finally.

"Edward, right there…mmm…yeah…a little to the- oh God!" Bella moans out as I pound into her mercilessly.

"You like that, ah?" I lick her pert nipple.

She moans her approval.

Faster than she can chant my full fucking name, I flip her on to her stomach and push her flat down. Her tiny fingers dig into the innocent sheets, poking a hole through the fabric, as I lift her ass and enter her.

Usually, I'm more attentive, but I've found my dick gives Bella all the pleasure she needs to climax in this particular position. Hence, I thrust every single inch of my dick into her tight pussy in a frenzied manner. Sex consumes my brain and I go even faster, so much so I'm concerned I may be hurting Bella. After all, her vagina is still relatively new to being worshipped with such onslaughts. However, Bella's throaty moans and the movements of her hips alert to me that everything is A-Okay.

The sweat builds up tremendously, and my chest collapses onto Bella's back. Luckily, this does not deter my movements. The intensity I'm feeling actually increases- if that's even possible.

Bella orgasms for the third time of the night and I speed up. I recognize her pussy must be extremely sensitive by now; therefore, I do everything I can to cum quickly.

And when I do, it's the best climax of my thirty-two years.

Currently, it's two in the morning on Saturday night. Bella, Jake, and I are indulging in a movie night.

In reality, Alice is on a date. A fucking DATE. With _Dr. Hale. _Who dates their physician? I mean c'mon?Anyways, I am waiting up in hopes of catching a glance at this date of hers. At the start of the evening, I had PUSHED Alice out the door. Sianara Bitch!

BUT that was before Jake felt the need to recount horror stories of what happens when a new daddy comes into children's lives. No way was I going to be replaced! I needed to gauge the situation desperately- scope out my competition for Daddy of the Year.

Bella and I are snuggled up on the couch, with Jake lounging nearby on the arm chair- MY arm chair. Shesh, I'm not always so territorial, but damn it- that's my chair! Every man is entitled to his very own comfy chair that he can relax in. But noooo…Jakey is the guest so I have to share. According to Bella anyways.

According to me that's pure bull shit.

The sting wouldn't cause so much pain if only Jake wasn't throwing me smug looks every five seconds. I glare at him in response- it's so ON.

Abruptly, we all hear the sounds of two women giggling in the hallway.

_Hmmm…._

As I click a possibility in my head, I hold onto Bella closely. Shit! Please, _please, _don't let it be one of those psycho stalkers who call themselves fans! Fans adore you and RESPECT you. Stalkers hound you and make you feel threatened. HUGE difference.

I grab a bat and tip toe to the front entrance. I stop dead in my tracks.

There's Alice holding hands and sharing loving gazes with a young-looking woman.

She jumps when she notices me staring at her and the blonde beauty accompanying her.

"Jesus, Edward! You scared me!" Alice giggled.

Alice+ giggling= WHAT THE HELL AM I MISSING?

Blondie clears her throat and Alice composes herself.

"Rosalie, this is my ex-husband, Edward." I give a nod at Blo-Rosalie, still confused.

"Edward, this is Rosalie. _My date." _She empathizes the last sentence, with a pointed look.

_Her date?..._

_HUH!_

**Wow! I did not think I'd be able to finish this so quickly!**

**It was quite fun to write. I hope it was just as fun to read!**

**I promise for more Bella/Edward action in the next chapters. You have more word that the rest of the story will be more focused on them. =)**

**So….what do you think? **

**PLEASE REVIEW! **

**I'd appreciate at least 15 reviews before I get the next chapter up.**


	6. Chapter 6

**Thank you for the reviews on the last chapter! Yes, the Rosalie thing was a bit of a surprise!**

**But I have a confession to make: As much as I love their individual characters, I don't like Jasper and Alice as a couple- does that make me a bad Twilight fan? :O**

**Anyways, I've got no virtual plan for this chapter, so I'll see how it goes! **

**Hopefully, more Bella and Edward…..!**

**EPOV**

"No fucking way!" Bella draws out each syllabus of the three words.

"Yep. Alice digs vagina- literally!" I exclaim. Bella gives a slight look of disgust.

"Eww…I don't want to have the image of Alice giving blow to somebody! She's just so….non sexy. No offense." She quickly adds.

"Oh stop being modest. You're the one who enjoys watching lesbian porn."

Bella childishly sticks her tongue out at me. "Those were with hot blondes, not cranky pixies."

"Believe me, Bells, this is one HOT blonde Alice has."

"Hmmmm….I'll see it when I believe it. I can't trust your judgment. You did say Rosalie was a doctor. And your Grey's Anatomy obsession dictates that you must find every doctor hot."

"SSSHHH! Fuck, Bella! You can't say that shit out load- especially with Jacob lurking nearby." I'm mortified that she'd take the chance of my guilty pleasure becoming common knowledge to the world.

"We're in our bedroom, Edward. Believe me; Jakey's learned not to listen in on us." She reasons, pulling the covers on over her scantily clad body.

"True." I agree before joining her in the comfort of our bed.

"Now, it's four in the morning, time to get some sleep." She demands.

My heavy eyelids are drooping closed when Bella decides to break her own damn advice.

"WAIT! Is this Dr. Hale spending the night?" She puts her ear up to the wall, waiting for the sounds of moans and pleasure.

"No." I reply groggily. "She went home."

"Oh." Bella is clearly disappointed.

_What a strange girl._

**Edward & Bella**

Girly giggling.

Babyish giggling.

Tugging on my hair.

OUCH!

"Riley, don't pull on daddy's hair!" a female scolds, but she doesn't sound too concerned.

More tugging.

More giggling.

"You crazy kid!" The voice sounds again.

Then, I feel it. Sticky liquid is splashed all over my famous bronze hair.

"WHAT THE-" I jump abruptly from laying on my stomach and am met with a wide- eyed Riley. He clings tightly to Bella's chest and begins to cry. Awesome! Crying is my favorite type of alarm.

A substance glides down my forehead and I am reminded of the mess in my hair.

"What happened?" I cradle precious strands of my soaked locks.

"You made the poor baby cry! You resembled a demon and sounded like one too! The poor little thing." Bella gives me a disapproving glare and begins to pat Riley's back in soothing circles.

"I meant with my hair." I gently stroke the red curls on Riley's head and whisper soothingly, "Sorry bud, didn't mean to startle you."

"Oh about that- I guess Riley wants you to color your mane. He spilt all his orange juice on you- and not on accident." She shrugs.

"Ugh, wonderful! It's gonna take two hours to thoroughly get all of the stench and gunk out of my hair." I complain with a frown playing on my lips.

"Well, it's good it's Sunday and you're free to be lazy all day." Bella says unsympathetically.

"Exactly, I'm supposed to sleep in today." I resume pouting.

"Stop it ya baby! It made Riley laugh. And honestly, what's more important than your child's happiness?" Bella grins.

"My sanity." I grumble on my way to the blessed shower. There's not a chance in hell I'm letting this evil orange tamper with my natural bronze shade!

My vision is blurred from the bright lights of the bathroom- I'll definitely be replacing those! If there's anything worse than having orange juice embedded in one's hair, it's getting blinded by one's own electricity.

"Damn it!" I yelp as I smash my foot up against the miniature trash can. All of the discarded materials rush out of the container.

Picking garbage up. Add that to my growing list of fun morning activities!

Shesh, Bella's correct…I have become quite grouchy in the mornings. I AM becoming an old man.

I'll have to evaluate that scary thesis more in-depth later. Right now, the plan of action is to clean up this mess and take a shower. Though with my luck, I'll probably get a concussion caused by an onslaught of running water. Wouldn't the tabloids have a field day with that one!

Scrunching down, I rub my eyes, attempting to refocus them. When I remove my hands from my tired eyes, I'm met with a white stick glaring up at my confused gazed. A stick that has the most frightening one letter word written on its tiny screen.

No. Fucking. Way.

I take my fists and furiously rub them against my now _sore and panicking _eyes.

After I complete the attack, I glance back again at the evil little white stick.

It's still there.

And it still says the p letter word every sexually active guy fears.

"Pregnant."

_**I'm sorry I wanted to make this a little longer, but alas, this happened. I'll try to update much sooner to make up for the short chapter!**_

_**And don't worry, I'm not known for going along the path that every author does. Expect many twists in the next adaptions. *-***_

_**Thoughts? **_

_**Please Review!**_


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